Thoughts on Heroes and Jacob's Fight With God

     Often when I read of the biblical heroes, I see myself. Because, if we look at them honestly, they really weren't heroes. David committed adultery and then murdered the woman's husband to cover it up. Jacob lied, cheated, and stole his way to wealth. Moses was a murderer. Paul hunted down Christians prior to his conversion. Peter denied the Christ, and then later on in life shunned the gentiles until Paul rebuked him for it. James and John were impulsive hotheads. Elijah ran and hid in a cave. Job did nothing but complain against God. Solomon was all kinds of messed up. Samson was one very impressive, impulsive, violent mess.

In fact, if we look honestly at almost any biblical character, we can see that they all had blatant flaws. All of them screwed it up big time. No one is really a hero. We have certain men and women we look up to, we respect because of something they did or refused to do. Some of my personal heroes include Eric Liddell, Jackie Robinson, Abraham Lincoln, William Wilberforce, and Lacey Sturm. But even these had their flaws.

You cannot find a human being truly worthy of the title hero. Only Christ can fulfill that role. But I still cling to the lives and actions of these people, not because they are people that I consider so much better than myself, but rather because they are so much like myself. They stumbled and fell, they failed and broke. And in the end, by God's grace, they prevailed. It all comes back to God. If there is any human being worthy of our respect, it is only because God has worked in their lives. We can learn from their stories. We can draw encouragement from their failures and triumphs.

I was reading today in Genesis 32, of Jacob wrestling with God. Everything in that passage reminds me of myself. Jacob fights unrelentingly with God. He will not let go. He won't relent. He won't give in. Even when God cheats. I feel God often has to cheat to get our attention. He dislocates Jacob's hip. He puts Jacob in excruciating pain. And still Jacob won't let go. God literally has to beg him to let go, and then caters to Jacob's demands. Jacob holds on, demanding that God bless him.
    
Of course, God is God. And He could've worked any sort of miracle to give Himself the upper hand. He could probably have teleported, or rendered Jacob immobile. He could have done any number of things. But instead He met man on his own ground. And on man's terms, man prevailed. That fact bothers me a little. And yet, God still refuses to break away from the intimacy of a good brawl with His beloved. To work a miracle and give Himself the upper hand, I imagine God would have become distant again to Jacob. Instead God chose to stay where He was, on His back in the dirt, with man pinning Him down. He allows Jacob to win. And then asks Jacob to let Him go. He then caters to Jacob's demand of blessing.

In my own life, I feel I am fighting with God. Now, I'm not going to try to stretch this metaphor too far. If I tried, it would lose all the power and meaning. But I know I am wrestling with God. And in some sense I refuse to let go. I will not give in. Honestly, I don't think I know how to give in. And I feel like God is disjointing me.

It's like the Breaking Benjamin song Hopeless, when he says, "I cannot hold on- I will not let go." That's me.

For those of you unfamiliar with the song, here is a lyric video from YouTube. If you don't like metal music, I suggest you just look up the lyrics.

Unlike Jacob, though, my fight has not reached a conclusion. I'm still impossibly holding on. Fighting for I know not what. Begging God to bless me.

I don't know where to go or what to do. I don't know why I'm fighting or what I'm holding on to. I don't even know how to stop fighting.

And more and more I realize I don't understand this God I'm madly in love with and yet hopelessly at war with.

So here I lie, broken and disjointed, refusing to let go, demanding God bless me.

No Compromise- Ever.

So, I've been giving a lot of thought to this upcoming election. Many, many Christians are telling me to vote for Trump. "Vote for the Trump," they say, "Because if we are not unified around the Republican party, then the Democrats will win." Sounds logical right? In fact, just before the Republican Convention I was worried. I was on the verge of deciding to back Trump, and cast my vote in his favour, "for the good of the party." But then I heard Ted Cruz's speech. and it brought it all back into focus.

We are CHRISTIANS. We are not Republicans. We are not even conservatives. We are followers of Christ. This world, this nation, it is not ours. And we do not belong to it. We have a higher calling. We are made of greater stuff than this. We have been placed on this earth to shine a light. And not just any light, but THE Light. How does rallying around a figure head like Donald Trump proclaim Jesus? Trump is violent, bigoted, egotistical, self centered, immoral, headstrong, self important, And the list goes on. Following a man like him, supporting a man like Trump, is supporting every thing that the message of Christ rejects.

So what if the Democrats win? So what if Republicans don't hold the oval office? So what if this nation further turns its back on God? It's already done that. The die is already cast. This nation has made it's choice. We as followers of Christ, as heirs to a better kingdom, are not here to follow along, no matter how begrudgingly, in it's footsteps. We are here to speak the truth. We are here to take a stand. We are here to represent Jesus to the world. We are here to show the world what a true Christian does. We are the only glimmer of God that they know.

And it doesn't matter if we are the minority. It doesn't matter if our votes are seemingly wasted. We are God's people. And we have been given this right to vote not to use like pearl before swine. Everything we do. Every action. Every word spoken- it must all always point to Him.

Believers- We are the remnant. We are aliens in this land. We are messengers to the world. We are not of this world. We are His! Listen to me please.

Is it better to vote for a man made party with false, self-centered, godless men as our leaders? Or is it better to vote as our God-given conscience prompts us to? We are at war. We are outnumbered, out manned, outgunned. But I for one will never surrender. I will never back down. I will never give in. I don't care if all my rights are stripped from me. I don't care if I am persecuted for my faith. I will count it all joy. For I know when I am reviled an persecuted for Jesus's sake, I am counted blessed. And to find honor in God's eyes is all I care about.

Who will stand with me? Who will be the rebels with me? Will you become a cog in the machine? Will you become just another brain-dead Christian following Trump around on his Republican leash? Or will you take a stand for Christ, no matter how futile it may feel.

Join the rebellion. Be an outcast. Be a renegade. Never give in. Never back down.

We are Christ's. We are the remnant. And we must never stop fighting. We must never compromise our values. We must never drag His name through the mud. We are held to a higher standard than this.